
The sloppy cursive tradition continues. I didn't follow the directions exactly because no tengo las cebollas verdes. I also wasn't able to take pictures for every step.

"1 clove of fresh garlic, finely minced and crushed with a spoon." Or three?

"1 wedge of red and yellow pepper each, sliced and diced worthy of a ninja." I didn't have a red pepper, so I used orange instead. I probably can't taste the difference between different peppers anyway.


"5 eggs, beaten like a prince's most sturdy whipping boy." There have been heated debates with my roommates about whether or not eggs should be beaten before or after they hit the skillet. I say that eggs should be beaten before because I want to add other ingredients first and prevent damage to the skillet's non-stick surface. My roommates are always like WTF are you doing? Whatever dudes. I'm just a prescramblin' kinda guy, but as long as the beating still happens it's all good.

"Eyeball Measurement of Basil, ground like the bones of an Englishman." A local company named McCormick stole the joy of grinding basil from me.

Plop plop plog. "Add enough cheese to make a B movie funny. Scramble everything up because you do like them, Sam-I-am." I added just a few sprinkles of cheese because I think B movies are hilarious as they are.

"Eyeball Measurement of Milk, with care not to splash." Drip drip drip.

"Eat. And enjoy."

*Leans back. Holds stomach. Groans.* Five eggs was a couple too many. I normally only eat two or three. *Drinks water to reduce discomfort.*
A tasty and easy to follow recipe thanks to funny metaphors. My biggest mistake was continuing to eat after I started to get egg stomach. This might've been avoided if I had recorded the title of recipe when I was copying it with sloppy cursive. I didn't even realize the recipe had a title until I was checking the validity of the hyperlink I wrote down. Silly me thought that the recipe had no title. I now understand why it's called "Delicious Eggs for Two."